end of summer?

June 15, 2011

Not sure what I expected last week, but what I got kind of threw me off. It is hard not to compare things, and I try to keep in my mind that what my ideal may not be the ideal for the whole world. That being said, I do think the first week of school, or heck even day could have been managed a little bit better.

I showed up, and I guess I thought all the kids would be wearing their uniforms and have full bags of supplies, and the teachers would have fun get to know you activities planned. What I got was a mass of parents, students, and teachers listening to the principal shout out names. They were just finding out their classes. None of the students had book bags. None of them were wearing uniforms. I just stood around in the way.

Once classes were figured out we marched to class and sat, and sat, and sat until recess. Which was a bust; there was no food, which upset all the teachers. Then we went back to the class and MH was called to a meeting to figure out her teaching schedule. I entertained the students asking them questions. MH came back right before lunch, told me Grade 6 would be right after lunch and sent me on my merry way. Got back from lunch and found out Grade 6 wouldn’t be until 2:40. So I sat and waited. Then in Grade 6 not much occurred, and MH actually left to work on the schedule. In the first week of school our schedule was changed 8 times through 3 different options.

The kids took a pretest, and were still working on finishing their oral reading tests. My Grade 5 students, whom I’ve taught just once on a random day last year, busted out amazing paragraphs about their summer break and best friends with just basic grammar mistakes kids their age at home would make. My Grade 6 students who are the same group of kids I had last year were writing long in depth paragraphs about their summer breaks and what they want to be when they grow up.

This cued the personal break down. These kids are smart. Maybe I could be used better somewhere else. I tried to talk to my principal all week about it, but she was not available much. However I did talk to her this week, and I’m not having the what am I doing here thoughts I was having. I’ve arranged a meeting with the principal at the high school to start a sports club. After fiesta I’m meeting with my library committee. I’ve convinced my teacher that I’d be really good at helping grade 5 and 6 remedial readings in the after noon.

This is week two of school, and you know what things are going to be ok.

July 9, 2011

Now we are going into week 6 (wow, how did that even happen?) and things have gotten better. I’ve still been struggling trying to really make the impact I want to make, but we are getting there. Library meetings are being had. I’m meeting with the principal at the high school any day now to get a project going there. I’ve had some good lessons with my students. My idea for a remedial reading program was liked, but nothing has happened since the first couple of pow-wows. 

just a little shell shock

August 28, 2010

i have a purpose! i am still just a trainee, but finally got a job and area and language! i was so nervous, but felt very unique in my anxiety. people were wondering where they would be and what they would be speaking but I was so focused on my job. primary education is a brand new program this year in the philippines and only 10 volunteers would be in this sector. this was not public information, but wasn’t private either and slowly was sneaking out of the current volunteers mouths. i was so nervous: only 10 of the 80 some odd of us. well it happened I am going to be teaching year 6 students (11-12 year olds). i will be training in palo, leyte and learning to speak waray waray. i have been here in leyte for almost a day and half. and i am realizing just how huge this is.

my host mom is a retired teacher and i live with here and her daughter in her 30s. next door is either 1 or 2 of her sons and their families (not quite sure). she also has 2 children married and living france and a child studying here, but not in palo. i have a room on the first floor.

we have not quite settled into our routines yet, which makes sense considering i just got here. i find myself alone a lot and i am not quite sure where everybody went. i think they go next door and are doing there day to day routines. as they should, but until monday i do not have a day to day routine of my own, but i’ve been aching for that long before finding myself home alone in the philippines (the desire goes back to kemmerer). hopefully once i get my routine going i can fit into their routine also. because right now i just feel like a hindrance amongst other things. namely being lonely. this is the first time since philadelphia i have not been surrounded by people at all times, and at pst i had found a great group of people who didn’t mind that my name was not same as theirs. it was sad to say goodbye to laura, and jessica, and sarah, and laura, and jessica, and the other sarah is here with me but not in my training cluster so in a different part of town. but it will be good for us to have our individual experiences and share and visit each other. whale sharks here we come (well as soon as we can leave site)!

i am not home sick, but at this point i am thinking too much. thinking of kemmerer, and thinking of albuquerque, and foremost thinking of vermont (a place i’ve never been). it is kind of frustrating that i am sitting here alone in a new house while two of my dear friends are getting married. they are happy for me, but we all thought i was going to be too busy to not be missing the festivities. wrong, too bad it is not next weekend when i have started classes. i miss my family, and still wish i could have said better goodbyes and currently had better communication with my friends. these are things with time that i will still miss, but won’t be active in my mind.

i know that this is just an adjustment. every single thing is new, and i am going into sensory over load and not handling a malaria pill too well. wyoming is quiet and leyte has given me a home with a rooster tethered by my window. wyoming smells like cattle and leyte smells like fish. wyoming is cold and getting to be fall and leyte is hot and thriving. the view from the plane was one of the best things i have experienced in my whole life. so green and thriving and good. wyoming is rural and leyte and the philippines are so alive and busy. 

things i am for sure not use to, but very excited to think of the norm and find my groove here. overall my thoughts of the philippines and this huge thing i have chosen to do are so overwhelming, but it is overwhelmingly good! i am falling in love with it.