in tents, like a circus

the other day i was so excited that i was basically two weeks away. two weeks! it sounded brave, bold, and daring.
well now two weeks isn't an idea anymore it is now a reality. a scary reality. i'm not so sure about my moxie to take this on any more. i'm so very very nervous. which is good. i think it would be less than normal if i wasn't afraid.
i'm ready to go, and i'm sure i'll be fine. but i'm embarking on a life changing adventure. if it wasn't huge i wouldn't embark. you don't embark to go grocery shopping, which is why it is not scary. but because i am embarking it just ups the intensity by whoa!
i'm ready to leave despite the anxiety to involve. well scratch that, i'm not so ready as i could leave on the plane tomorrow. i've still got to finish making all those pre-departure lists of things to do, of what to pack to bring with me, what to pack for the parents to save, and then check off the things on those lists. i'm starting to realize that i should just do what i know i need to do and if i've forgotten something oh well! roll with the punches, i'm sure you can survive without that very american luxury you failed to think about before hand.
i'm over that nervousness. the reality is i am leaving (embarking, haha) and i am nervous. the nerves will get me through once i can find my sleep again. intense.... like a circus.